The Costly Art of Being Linda Evangelista Forever
Linda Evangelista recently appeared on the cover of the September issue of British Vogue cover and admitted the face presented on the cover is not hers. Linda explained her statement by revealing that face tape was applied to pull back her skin to achieve an artificially smooth appearance. Add in a generous amount of photoshopping and the combined effect is to produce a photographic image of Linda Evangelista that eerily rivals the work of her most famous shoots.
In the Vogue cover, Linda Evangelista, who is fifty-seven years old, bears a remarkable resemblance to her 20-year-old self when she was at her supermodel peak in the 80s. It is as if time has stood still and Linda Evangelista has remained unaffected by the natural ageing process. My first response to Linda’s comments was “of course that face isn’t yours. Your fifty. And no one at fifty naturally looks like this."
The more I read the more I learned: It turns out that Linda, a few years back, undertook a cosmetic procedure known as CoolSculpting to reduce fatty tissue in her face neck and body. Unfortunately, Linda is part of a minuscule percentage of the population whose bodies react poorly to the treatment resulting in a condition known as Paradoxical adipose hyperplasia (PAH); PAH is a rare side effect that causes the procedure to do the opposite of what is intended for; instead of shrinking fatty tissue PAH caused fatty tissue to expand and, in Linda’s case, create large visible growths that are hard to mask or hide even with thick clothing.
This is horrible, mind-blowing stuff. Linda details her difficult journey to overcome self-loathing and eventually come to terms with her condition and go out in the world without shame. The article proclaims Linda to be back and still glamorous. Linda says she’s still disfigured, but fashion is all about roleplaying and fantasy right, so why shouldn’t she indulge in her fantasies and have fun while doing what she loves the most: modelling.
I’m confused by the article. I don’t know how it is a celebration of Linda’s life or her present reality. Linda is a mature woman who looks less than perfect. In this Linda has much in common with the great majority of the women and men who populate the earth. However, the public has to an extent been fed a constant drip of PR nonsense by the fashion industry, the end effect being that it’s easy for some to believe that supermodels are a different species to the rest of us Homo sapiens, or, at the very least they belong to a mutant offshoot known as Homo Decoris Superior. Homo Decoris Superior, having won the evolutionary lottery, all pop out into the world blessed with height, thin muscles, clear skin and wonderful cheekbones, they have no acne marks or scar marks, they possess perfect hair that grows at three times the speed of other branches of humanity, and after giving birth to a child they return to the runway in a matter amateur of weeks without a stretch mark in sight above the bikini line, and then, somehow, in their 60s, they appear stick-thin on red carpets all around the world at movie premiers and social events.
The decisions by the likes of Naomi Cambell and Bella Hadid and countless other “naturally beautiful” models to resort to surgery to remove perceived “imperfections” proves the natural beauty myth to be a pernicious, destructive lie. The pressure models are under to improve existing qualities that brought them success in the first place is almost unimaginable: There’s always someone more beautiful, more hungry, and more ruthless to overcome to successfully secure the top billing, and there’s always another take-no-prisoners rival who will snatch the job of a lifetime away from the rightful owner (and their agent, and their apartment) unless a model is prepared to do whatever it takes to win!
After reading a few biographical heavy articles of a few industry luminaries, I’ve also learned the career goal of becoming an actual supermodel requires the physical dedication of a world-class heptathlon athlete and the mental discipline of a chess grandmaster; there are so many disciplines to master: To protect herself against poor workmanship and ensure her photographs are of the highest quality when they arrive on her client’s desk, a supermodel must understand how to use light as well as Herb Ritts, and be able to establish a collaborative mood on set that matches the best efforts of a Richard Alvedon. The same applies to learning how to apply their own make-up under extreme time limitations in case the booked makeup artist is inexperienced or lacks an understanding of how to apply the correct foundation or blusher to brown or super-pale skin, and then top it off with having to be psychologically strong enough to parade a body you have many hang-ups about before a horde of highly critical strangers and its clear a supermodel is a rare breed indeed - all of this while religiously adhering to a low-calorie diet, downing a bathtub worth of water every day, embracing leafy salads as God’s gift to the beautiful, and avoiding all desserts as if every dish were contaminated with a spoonful of Botulism - and we haven’t even discussed the cost of dental work.
Getting to the top of the modelling profession requires a work ethic only the likes of Fred Astaire and Beethoven can relate to. Staying at the top of this profession for a significant amount of time is hard. A true contender must always be seen to be attending the right parties, they must successfully befriend designers who are at the top of the game, while simultaneously forging dependable new friendships with innovative new geniuses who are about to make their established designer friends redundant. A true Supermodel Hall of Famer must be prepared to sacrifice the careers of their rivals on the alter of their unquestionably magnificent legacy: They must become and then remain the favourites of the most powerful magazine editors while repeatedly coming up with new strategies to fend off younger, newer, fresher, more ethnic, more androgynous, more trans, more anything new and trendy that cannot readily be categorised as a Them or They. Nothing can be left in the tank if a supermodel wishes to succeed, conquer and, above all, become successful enough to depart the industry on their terms. The dolling out of this enormous level of emotional energy for so long, with an unrelenting focus, comes with a high price and requires something akin to a profound expenditure of the soul.
And still, despite all of this, there is one force that no amount of unyielding Stalinesque willpower can overcome. And that force - of course - is the inevitable progression of time.
Supermodels tend to begin their careers when they’re young. According to a survey by Vogue Business “data shows that only one out of every 200 models during Spring/Summer 2020 were above the age of 50. Studies performed within the fashion industry indicate most models in the United States began their careers between the ages of 12 and 16 yrs.
An agent might claim the business uses so many young models because their skin is flattered by and rewards the glare of natural and artificial light, and also provides a better base for make-up. Cultural reasons also apply. The heterosexual and homosexual worlds are equally fascinated by youth. Brook Shields, Kate Moss and Kia Gerber have all been widely celebrated for their prepubescent, waif-like innocence. Oscar Wilde’s detailed predilection for impoverished, vulnerable young boys appears beyond criticism. While social analysts and researchers point to data that reveals young, inexperienced girls are easier to exploit and control. Profound misogyny is infused into the very molecules of the fashion industry. Models are often described as “walking clothes hangers”, but the phrase is even more hateful than this. The reason models are called “clothes hangers” is because clothes are supposed to hang off them in the same way they would hang from a hanger in a clothing store. The clothes are the thing, not the body that carries them up and down a runway.
Linda came to the fore during the 80s and 90s when skilled artists were required to hide imperfections within the modelling fraternity. Nowadays, a light-fingered digital maestro can edit any unseemly physical feature out of the frame and digitally sculpt unseemly thick thighs into “more attractive” slim appendages (that couldn’t possibly bear the weight of the body attached to them). So what is the problem?
Unfortunately, for the older supermodel, all of life doesn’t occur within the monitor of a computer screen. At some point, they have to physically turn up to the dinner ball and step out before hundreds of photographers at a major promotion or celebrity event. And absolutely no one wants to see Cindy Crawford or Christy Turlington or Naomi Cambell displaying a body bearing tell-tale signs of having birthed another human being into the world, or daring to ruin the entire evening by bringing along a face that might reflect forty years of exposure to wind, rain, stress, pollution and therefore -No, God, No !! - show real signs of having aged.
By aged, I mean matured and altered to the point where the supermodel is not so super anymore, solely because she no longer appears exactly like a version of herself who once existed 20- 30 years ago. The artificially created photographic representation of Linda that existed upon a sheet of glossy paper within a hefty fashion magazine, was a photographic image forged by the efforts of a hardworking, extremely skilled team of illusionists, who spent hours slaving away to create a singular vision of a fantasy woman that never bore any resemblance to the makeup-free, digitally unenhanced Linda who essentially provided the head, face, ears and neck for the team of illusionists to splash their magic upon. Young Linda never looked like the” finished”, "put together” Linda who casually commanded high fees to appear on premier shows and adorn the covers of prestige magazines.
The “Linda Evangelista look” was always unreal. We all get that. So why has Vogue chosen to hark back to a fake look?
Even before Linda’s misfortune with cold sculpting, she no longer looked like her concocted former self. Why? Well, like every single mortal who ever lived upon this earth, Linda aged and - I’m prepared to say this out loud, she put on weight. It’s a matter of the historical record that every human being who has ever lived, eventually aged and died. It must also be said that amongst the extraordinarily large number of human beings who have actually lived upon planet earth and then gone on to age and carry extra weight upon their hips we can include a small number of exceptional humans whose devoted followers have ardently claimed them to be half-human and half-divine. And yet even these exceptional beings, when facing certain death, could not look at a portrait of themselves and claim they hadn’t changed a bit.
The supermodel is paid the big bucks by her employer because she sells expensive pots and tubes that are filled with all sorts of creams and powders that claim to remove deep wrinkles overnight and turn back the ageing clock. A supermodel who doesn’t look good inspires buyers to think “if she has access to all of that good product and looks like that, then surely the product is rubbish”. If a supermodel lacks the beauty to inspire others to spend their dollars beautifying themselves when her own body is no longer enhanced or salvageable by products she promotes (products that are part of an industry worth close to 1.7 trillion dollars in 2022) what is the point of her?
Certainly, a plain-looking woman, let alone a “disfigured” woman has no place in a high-end fashion magazine. With a growing number of so-called plus-sized models, weight is no longer a barrier to success as long as plus-sized models from the neck up have a “look” that fits the accepted beauty criteria. Linda’s current manufactured appearance in Vogue is not a celebration of her existence or spiritual journey, it is a denial of every pain, every torment she has endured and overcome. The marks we gain on our bodies are there because we earned them. To deny them is to deny having lived. I would not have been so confused by the Vogue piece if Vogue and Linda had chosen to celebrate her triumph honestly and without any artificial aids. But I also accept that Linda wished to maintain her high-end fashion legacy and build on the Vogue shoot as she goes forward. All power to her. She will surely become a powerful advocate for women’s health and empowerment.
The last word belongs to Linda who insisted her insecurities were taken care of due to the visual modifications made by the vogue photographic and editorial team and said, I’m trying to love myself as I am.”